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‘My mom destroyed my grandma’s wedding dress because I wanted to wear it’

A Reddit user has taken to the social media platform to vent about the actions their mom took as a result of the wedding dress they wanted to don on their big day.
They wished to opt for their grandma’s old wedding gown, yet their mom was completely against it for her own reasons, resulting in petty actions.
She explained the situation in a post, writing: “I’m getting married, and I want to wear nan’s dress, which was originally worn by her in the late 60s, was restored in the mid 90s, and was preserved and still in good condition today.
“When I told mum she became upset and angry, saying I couldn’t use nan’s dress as I look too much like nan already and the dress would add to that, and began sending me other dress ideas and offered to pay for a new one, all of which I rejected.
“The dress was being stored at nan’s house. My grandfather was looking after it and he was the one who offered me the dress in the first place. It was up in his attic and was very carefully stored.
“Three days ago, mum went to grandad’s house, saying that I’d tasked her with picking up the dress. Grandad let her in. She then left without the dress. Grandad realised she’d forgotten the dress after she left, went up to the attic, and found it covered in black stains. He called me.
“I think it’s ink. The dress is made with lace so I’ve been hand washing it as carefully as I can but it’s not coming out.
“Grandad says it’s fine, and it’s just a dress, but he’s clearly upset over this. I’ve spoken to mum, once, and she completely ignored my questions about the dress, only offering to buy me a new dress, and refusing to talk about nan’s dress, aside from saying it wouldn’t have suited me, anyway. Presumably because it would have made me look like nan.
“I am at my wit’s end with her, and I just can’t believe she would do this. I get she and nan had issues, but her issues with nan were not my issues with nan, but she’s letting that shape my relationship with her.
“This was just so unnecessarily petty and spiteful. I don’t even know what to say to her any more.
“I don’t know what to say past this. I’m just furious. This probably should have been tagged as rant to be honest, but I figured it was more an update than anything.”

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Social media users left their comments on the situation, many expressing their sadness and extending cmofort.
One person said: “Is there any part of the dress you can salvage and have added to your eventual dress? I’m wondering if someone would be able to design and sew you an identical dress. I’m so sorry OP.”
Another chimed in: “If it’s ink, soak the dress in whole milk. Milk protein binds with ink, and lifts it. Soap nuts – available at health food stores- soaked in warm water produce a very gentle soap used by museums to clean historic lace.”
Someone else said: “Please take the dress to a professional restoration place and maybe they can get it out. (((hugs)))
“Also uninvite her from the wedding. And no contact is definitely an option you should consider.”
And an additional individual said: “Would you be comfortable in altering the look of it? You could have someone dye it. Not the whole thing, but put some black swirls (or some type of design) in it to where it would just look like you were making her dress your own, and also a tribute to her at the same time. You would still be able to wear her dress, and your mother’s awful actions would have been for nothing.”
With a suggestion, someone said: “I’m so sorry for you. She is such a nasty person. I would disinvite her and just not talk to her for a long time if ever. I hope you can remake the dress and use parts of it in the new dress.”

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